Biblical Ghosts

Wednesday was “Ash Wednesday” and it’s supposed to be this time of thoughtfulness and penitence and all that good stuff. So I’m kneeling there in the cathedral and praying, well kind of praying, mostly just thinking actually. So I’m kneeling there in the cathedral thinking, and the story of Job comes to mind. And as I’m thinking about Job I start to think about Jesus, and that’s when it came to me. In that moment I realized that Job and Jesus were the same thing as Silicon Valley, and if I’m right, and I am, Steve Jobs is Moses. But I really shouldn’t be talking about that right now (I’m typing on a Mac).

It’s actually frightening how many Bible personages seem to be reincarnated in our modern world. Here are a few of them:

1. Justin Timberlake is like Samson, since he’s cut his hair it’s all been downhill from there.

2. George W. Bush is Angel Of Death, with this war of his he’s killing a lot of firstborn.

3. Pauly Shore is like Noah, that “Biodome“ movie had too many parallels with the ark for it to be coincidence.

4. Susan Sarandon is definitely the Queen of Sheba, or at least she thinks she is.

5. And Dick Clark can be none other than Methuselah.

Do you see what I mean? As of yet I have not been able to draw any conclusions from this phenomena, but when I do I’ll be sure to let you in.